


James Franco Walks Into Captain America's Office And Somehow It's Not the Beginning of a Joke

by mambo



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: But Is Really Mostly Annoyed By James Franco, M/M, Or Sort Of, Steve Has A Deep Conversation About Feelings With James Franco, Steve Rogers Saves Franco and Rogen from North Korea, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-13
Updated: 2014-12-13
Packaged: 2018-03-01 06:02:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2762342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mambo/pseuds/mambo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve Rogers is not going to let a sub-par movie starring James Franco and Seth Rogen start World War III. Even if that means he has to actually deal with James Franco for 127 hours.</p>
            </blockquote>





	James Franco Walks Into Captain America's Office And Somehow It's Not the Beginning of a Joke

**Author's Note:**

> I'm going to be on some government watch list for writing this. Somehow I can't bring myself to regret it.

James Franco walks into Captain America’s office and somehow this isn’t the punchline to a joke.

Steve wouldn’t have even known who James Franco was, had Bucky not come home one day with a Best Buy bag. “I want to watch this,” he said, thrusting the blue bag into Steve’s hands. Bucky, of course, had already seen the movie and just wanted to see Steve’s reaction when James Franco _cuts his own arm off_. Steve calmly told Bucky that the joke wasn’t funny. Calmly told him by punching him in the face then openly weeping. The two of them are still working on themselves.

“Hey, it’s Captain America!” James Franco says as he just lets himself in without even the courtesy of a knock, then sits down in one of the two leather chairs—Stark’s choice, not his—on the other side of his desk. Steve wonders why he even comes to this office; nothing good ever happens to him here. “It’s nice to see you, man. Sorry about the whole… getting frozen for seventy years thing.”

“Yeah, that was real crummy,” Steve mutters, contemplating not only the office situation, but why he even bothered moving into Stark’s place. The security here is obviously inadequate, since James Franco just wandered into his office uninvited with bloodshot eyes. People may think Steve’s a saint, but he knows what that’s from. (By golly, he’s been to art school!) He knows what cannabis is. But since Steve is a good guy, he clears his throat, doesn’t comment on the smell, and asks, “What can I do for you, Mr. Franco?”

“You know who I am? Far out.” Steve clears his throat _again_ , but James Franco just stares at him with a vacant smile. Steve’s beginning to think that he’s a bit of a cold fish. Steve’s also beginning to think about maybe moving somewhere else. Like the Appalachians. Bucky wouldn’t mind that, would he? He’s never lived out in the sticks. It could be a new life, a new adventure for the two of them. It would also mean that they would be far from Manhattan, and movie stars wouldn’t just wander into Steve’s office anymore.

(This is, strangely, not the first time this has happened. He didn’t mind Steven Colbert, even if he was a bit too much of a super fan for comfort, and Ira Glass was a pleasure. But while the viral selfie he took with Ariana Grande went viral after she posted it to Twitter, she was a little hard to stomach. The worst, however, was Ryan Seacrest, who just wouldn’t shut up. And he keeps getting calls from Ryan Murphy, even though Steve has declined again and again to have the man produce a show about his life. He just doesn’t need that.)

Then Franco breaks the silence with, “Have you, uh, seen the trailer for my latest movie? The one that’s coming out on Christmas?”

Steve shakes his head. “I’ve been a bit busy,” he says. The _what with saving the world on a regular basis_ falling between them silently. Or at least Steve hopes that the implication is noticeable. He’s not sure James Franco understands. He’s not sure if James Franco understands anything.

“Well, uh, _Cap_.” There’s an air of condescension when he says Cap. Sarcastic. Steve doesn’t like it. He doesn’t like to pull rank too often, but he also doesn’t like being disrespected by entitled movie stars with both money and power. Steve has better things to do than be their dancing monkey. “You might wanna go watch it. Then, like, turn on a TV or something. Do you use the Internet?” He pauses for a moment, eyes growing wide. “Can you even use a computer?”

Steve doesn’t punch him, which will probably make Bucky proud. His self-control has increased in the 21st century.

**…**

“Did you get his autograph?” Clint asks, which is totally and completely beside the point. 

Sam nods. “Yeah, he was great in _21 Jump Street_.”

“That was his brother,” Clint says.

“I don’t think so,” Sam retorts. “I’m pretty sure it was James Franco. Does he even have a brother?”

“Either way,” Steve interjects, not this conversation is scintillating and important in the grand scheme of things, but they really need to focus. “James Franco is starting World War III.”

“That’s a bit overdramatic,” Tony says as he fills up his mug with coffee at the breakfast bar. When he’s done he walks to the table and sits between Clint and Sam. “Even for an actor.” He pauses, mug half raised to his mouth. “Even for _you_ , Cap, and that’s saying something.”

Steve can hear Bucky snort, even though he’s on the couch halfway across the room. When he thought Bucky was dead, and when he was chasing Bucky around Eastern Europe, and even when Bucky was back but recovering and not quite himself, Steve had forgotten what a _goddamn meatball_ he is. Sure, he’s now a super powered Soviet assassin, but he’s also a little stink. Showing a remarkable streak of self-control, Steve does not hawk a loogie over in Bucky’s direction, as much as he wants to.

“This is serious. The film Franco made with… Seth Rogen—“ who Steve didn’t know, but is apparently another popular, youngish actor with an affinity for pot“—has gotten a lot of bad publicity. Apparently the leader of—“

“That Franco guy’s a real pistol,” Bucky says from the couch. “Got a nice mug. You get him to take you out for coffee, too? Bet that made—“

“ _The leader of North Korea is threatening to start a war with the United States_ ,” Steve barks, blowing his cap because no one’s listening to him when there’s real trouble brewing. That’s definitely the only reason why. And Bucky turns his _ugly mug_ over so he’s looking at Steve and. And. Steve takes a deep breath through his nose, letting his eyes flicker shut for a moment. He’s calm. He is definitely calm. “The movie’s about two journalists trying to assassinate Kim Jong-un. Kim Jong-un’s not too happy about it. A few months ago he said he’d start a war over the movie. His people have been hacking the production company and releasing personal information about actors and its employees. We’re not sure what their next step will be, but it won’t be good.” He pauses. “I’ve already fought in one World War. I don’t want another. Especially if it’s started by James Franco.”

Bucky snorts, but other than that the room is quiet. You can call Steve a fun-sucker, but they need to focus. They need to figure out a plan.

Except that’s the moment that Clint exclaims, “I was totally right, it _was_ Dave Franco in…” Clint looks up from his iPhone. He glances to Steve, who is glaring, then to Sam, who is shaking his head. “Oh shit, sorry, I didn’t realize the mood had changed.”

Steve rolls his eyes because somehow, without him realizing, he ended up filling his life entirely with meatballs of the highest degree.

**…**

“Captain Rogers, it’s a real pleasure to—“

“Who the hell is that guy?” Franco interrupts, pointing over to Bucky. At least Seth Rogen has the manners to look embarrassed. “I thought you’d bring Tony Stark. I wanted to meet Iron Man!”

“Wait, no man, be cool,” Rogen says, grabbing at Franco’s arm. They’ve come to Avengers Tower for debriefing, and much to Steve’s annoyance, they’re sitting in the living room of his floor. Steve’s sitting at the table and Bucky—who would never miss a potentially embarrassing moment of Steve’s life—is sitting on the couch, flipping channels on the mute TV. “Don’t fuck this up for us.”

“But this guy’s such a prick, Seth. We should’ve called Spider-man, he—““You know Spider-man’s still pissed at the way you played—“

“You do realize that I’m here,” Steve says, looking at the two of them half-disbelieving them. And people thought Franz Ferdinand had bad judgment. The Archduke had nothing on the nimrods sitting in front of him. “I am sitting here, wasting time where I could be, I don’t know, saving your sorry asses from a North Korean grave.”

“Or savin’ a cat who’s stuck in a tree. Whichever’s less annoyin’,” Bucky says from the couch, slinging his metal arm over the back and looking their way. “I’m rootin’ for the cat, personally.”

“Oh my god,” Rogen says, almost reverent as he looks over. “You…” He glances at Franco, raises his eyebrows, but Franco just looks at him like he’s nuts. Then Rogen looks back at Bucky and says, “Don’t be offended if I’m wrong, but dude, are you Bucky Barnes?”

“Bucky Barnes… who the hell is Bucky Barnes?” Franco mutters. Steve’s already prominent frown gets deeper. Franco’s Wikipedia page says that he’s well-educated, and has degrees from several fine institutions. If James Franco is the product of the American educational system, Steve is deeply worried for the future of the country.

“In the flesh,” Bucky responds, waving his metal arm.

“How the fuck do you know who that is?” Franco asks and Rogen rolls his eyes.

“Dude, Bucky Barnes was, like, Captain America’s right-hand man. BFFs.” Steve glances over to Bucky, who is grinning at him. Steve quickly turns back to the bozos in front of him. For no reason at all. Whatsoever. Then Rogen adds, “But you’re supposed to be dead, dude.”

Bucky shrugs, turns back to the TV. “Yeah, well, so is he, but you’re not complainin’ ‘bout that.”

Franco makes a small, exasperated noise. “Seth, how the hell do you know this stuff? Are you some closet history nerd?” he accuses. 

“Nah man, but I watched the Captain America porno, like, twelve times in high school. It’s got Sergeant Barnes doin’ it in Captain America’s butt while he’s puttin’ it in Peggy Carter’s—“

“That’s enough,” Steve says, voice growing dark. “You shouldn’t disrespect—“

“Then how’d you know he’s supposed to be dead?” Franco asks, shaking his head.

Rogen sighs, puts a hand on Franco’s shoulder. “The sequel, man. Barnes dies and the only one who can soothe Captain America’s pain is Colonel Phillips and his Nazi-killing dick of—“

“Well,” Steve interrupts as Bucky laughs his ass off on the couch. “I think that’s all you needed me for, so if you could just get going, I think the leader of North Korea wants to—“

“Hey man, look, I’m sorry,” Rogen says and he seems sincere—something that Steve is convinced Franco is incapable of being—so Steve crosses his arms over his chest and waits. “You gotta know that this whole… thing? It’s kinda freakin’ us out. I mean, we’ve been in movies with a lot of controversy. But man, we really don’t want to be those two stoners who started World War III. I’m super not into that idea.” Franco purses his lips and nods. “And that’s why we came to you, Captain Rogers. You ended World War II, so maybe you can keep World War III from happening in the first place.”

“Don’t worry guys,” Bucky says from the couch. “This guy’ll keep that from happenin’. That’s the only reason why we keep this meatball around.”

“Takes one to know one,” Steve says, but without heat. He sighs, but stands up. He grabs his sketchbook from the kitchen counter and brings it back. Sitting back down, he opens it up to a few pages written up of tactics and ideals. While they look on, Steve begins, “Okay boys, here’s what we’re going to do…”

**…**

Through Tony’s contacts, Steve is going to take Franco and Rogen to meet Kim Jong-un to try to negotiate some kind of deal. If that goes sour, they’ll have some back-up ready to go for extraction. Steve hopes that Kim Jong-un will be reasonable enough to accept their apology in person, but Steve has difficulties believing that Franco will be sincere enough to convince anybody, let alone the leader of North Korea.

**…**

“I know you’re busy savin’ the world and whatever,” Bucky says after Rogen and Franco head out. “But I bet those dirty movies they were talkin’ about are short. How about a little fun before bed?”

The smirk on Bucky’s face is _obscene_. Steve wants to push him down, tell him that he doesn’t need some low-budget pornographic take on history to see Captain America with his pants off, and lick that evil smirk of Bucky’s goddamn face. But.

“Big day tomorrow,” Steve says, shutting his sketchbook and standing up. “I’m gonna get some shut-eye.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Bucky says with a sigh as Steve heads to his room. “Good luck tomorrow,” Bucky says as Steve’s about to close the door. Something drops in the pit of Steve’s stomach.

“Yeah,” he says, remembering that it’s not Bucky’s job to have his back anymore, that he doesn’t have to follow him into danger. “Thanks.”

The door closing behind him feels sort of like he’s saying goodbye, and he doesn’t know why.

**…**

Steve knew better than to schedule their dispatch before noon, so he has the morning to finish preparations. Bucky is gone by the time Steve wakes-up at six, off to do whatever it is that Bucky does during the day. Steve knows that sometimes he goes to the gym and works out, other days he heads to the mainland to walk around Brooklyn. Once in a while, Steve goes with him. Every so often, Bucky goes alone and comes back with a particular look in his eyes, one that Steve doesn’t ask about while he cooks dinner and Bucky watches TV with the volume too loud. Even on days like that, having Bucky living with him is better than every day Steve woke-up alone.

So Steve gets dressed and heads to the kitchen where…

“Morning Cap.” Where Barton is sitting in his pajamas and drinking a cup of coffee like he belongs there. “Everything’s ready for Operation Stoner. Did you get my autograph?”

Steve sighs, grabs his sketchbook from the table, and flips to a page in the back.

_To Clint,_

_Cap says you’re an asshole, so you must be a pretty cool guy._

_Love,_

_James Franco_

Clint grins. “Perfect,” he says.

Steve rolls his eyes, pours himself a cup of coffee, and reads up on North Korea online.

**…**

Steve’s making the final preparations on the runway when Bucky shows up.

Steve can only look. “Bucky,” he says, dumbstruck and, well, just plain dumb. He’s never been too smart when it comes to Bucky.

“Hey Stevie.”

“You’re—“

“You thought I was gonna let you go to North Korea without me? Jeez Steve, seventy years apart and it’s like you don’t remember a thing about me.” He’s close to Steve now, so close that Steve wants to grab him. Tell him _you don’t have to come, it’s going to be dangerous_ or _I’ve already asked so much of you that I couldn’t possibly make you come with me_ or, the worst one of all, _I’m so glad you’re here_. Bucky’s grin falters; Steve can see his Adam’s apple bob as he swallows. “Unless—“

“No Buck, I… I’m real glad you’re here.”

Bucky smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “I just, I wanted—“

“Losers,” Franco calls from behind Steve. Steve has to keep himself from physically flinching at the sound of the man’s voice, and he’s sure that his distaste shows on his face because Bucky lets out an undignified snort. “Are we going to North Korea or what? I wanna get Korean barbecue before we go talk to Kim.”

“Oh my god man,” Rogen says. “I _love_ Korean barbecue.” With a heavy-heart and the beginning seeds of a lot of regret, Steve gives Bucky a long-suffering look and heads over to the plane. “Bucky, man, have you ever had Korean barbecue?”

“The last time I went to North Korea I derailed a train, shot four people and spent the next two years in a frozen tube.”

The two guys stare at him for a good thirty seconds. James Franco’s mouth actually opens with shock; Steve notes with a hint of cruel glee that with his bushy eyebrows he really does resemble a neanderthal. “Well,” Rogen says finally. “That’s kind of messed-up.”

Bucky chuckles, walking past them into the walkway of the plane. “Lighten up guys, I was just kiddin’ ya.”

“Oh good,” Franco says, giggling a bit uncomfortably.

“It was only three guys and it was six years.”

Bucky enters the plane laughing—and despite the content, Steve can’t help but smile at Bucky’s twisted sense of humor—and the two actors look to Steve. “That’s messed-up,” Rogen says.

“And definitely not funny,” Franco adds on.

Steve shrugs and starts into the plane after Bucky. “Still funnier than most of your movies.”

“Touché,” Franco says to Steve’s back as Steve enters the plane.

**…**

The ride to North Korea is long, and even though the plane is fitted with an autopilot system, Steve sits in the cockpit just in case something happens. Not that Steve has a great track record with landing planes, but it still makes him feel a bit better knowing he’d have some modicum of control over the situation if something were to go awry. They’re about two hours in when James Franco enters the cockpit; Steve is able to overcome the urge to roll his eyes. No matter what Bucky may say, Steve has absolutely remarkable self-control.

“So,” Franco says drawn-out, as he sits in the chair next to Steve’s. Steve suddenly feels uneasy, like Franco entering the cockpit was a bad omen. “What’s the deal with you and, uh, _Bucky_?” There’s a sarcastic edge to his voice when he says Bucky, like his name is a joke.

Feeling defensive, Steve just says, “He’s my best friend.” The simple statement simultaneously sums up the entirety of their relationship while also explaining none of it. There aren’t really words for what Bucky means to Steve, the way he—

“Best friends like _fucking_ best friends?” Steve stares at Franco in confusion. “Did you have that word back then? Fuck? It means—“

“I know what fuck means, Franco. And I can say it in six languages. What I don’t understand is what you’re trying to insinuate.”

Because if James Franco has realized that Steve has, well, feelings for Bucky, then it must be seriously obvious, since Franco is one of the most oblivious men Steve has ever had the displeasure of meeting. Does it really show that much? _Does everyone know?_ Clint has been looking at Steve weirdly lately. Or is that just his imagination and—

Does Bucky know?

Did it just get warmer in the plane? Because Steve thinks it may have gotten warmer in the plane.

“I mean, I know you guys are from the 1930s or whatever, but there’s a lot of sexual tension between the two of you. The banter, the longing looks when you think the other one’s not looking…” Franco grins, makes an over-exaggerated shrug. “It just seems like the two of you want to fuck.”

“I don’t know what you mean.” Steve hopes he’s not sweating. “You should probably stop taking so many drugs, son. They must be messing with your worldly perception.” If Bucky were in the room, he’d be laughing his ass off at Steve’s grandpa impersonation. But thankfully, Bucky’s in the main cabin trying to teach Rogen how to play bridge.

“You should try smokin’ some time, Captain. May get the stick out of your ass.” There’s no heat behind it, and Steve almost wishes there were, because this conversation seems way too much like James Franco likes him. “But, like, I think it’s kinda messed-up that the two of you wanna bone so bad, but won’t.” He pauses, looks contemplative. “You know guys can bone, right? Like, do you need me to tell you how to fuck? Because honestly that’d be—“

“I know that men can have sex,” Steve interrupts, because this is _not_ a conversation that his manners were ever prepared for. “Again: I was in the army.” He pauses. “But men can also have relationships, Franco. I’m not looking to just _bone_ anyone.” Especially Bucky, he doesn’t add. “And if you think that people can only be satisfied from having intercourse with each other, there’s a lot you need to learn.”

Franco laughs, which isn’t what Steve wanted from this. Really, Steve just wants him to leave. “Man, you take being ninety to new levels. And you’re such a dick about it!” Franco starts laughing again and Steve really wishes he were back in New York. “But, like, you own it man. Gotta respect that.”

And that’s when Captain America fist-bumped James Franco and the world pretty much turned on its axel.

“But, like, you’re totally in love with that guy,” Franco says. “So even if you don’t wanna just bone him, you should tell him. Because if you don’t, someone else will and man, you’re gonna be pissed.”

**…**

While flying over France, Steve gets a call. “This is Rogers,” he answers.

“Copy that, it’s Hill. We’re gonna turn the plane around,” she says.

“Why?” Steve asks.

Hill sighs. “Sony and the North Korean government came to an agreement about the film.” Franco, who had been napping in the seat next to Steve’s, begins to stir. “They’re not going to release the film in the Eastern Hemisphere, apparently. It’ll make sure that the movie makes no money, so President Kim Jong-un felt that was an apt punishment. Plus, they’re making them release the movie simultaneously on-demand. Apparently, and I’m quoting the President of North Korea here, ‘VOD is where careers go to die.’ So, that means you’re off the hook.”

Steve sighs with relief, but Franco’s furious when Steve tells him. “What the hell?” he asks, angry and expressing more emotion than Steve thinks he’s seen from the man up this point. And his life was being threatened by the North Korean government. “VOD? What the fuck?” He looks at Steve, glaring. “Turn the plane back. Let’s go shoot someone from Sony in the face.”

“No,” Steve responds, getting way too much enjoyment from the whole situation. “Thank you, Lieutenant Hill. It’s always a pleasure.”

“You too, Steve. Over and out,” she says before disconnecting.

“What’re you gonna do about this?” Franco asks, agog like it’s still Steve’s problem. Which it’s not. The world is no longer being threatened, and that means Steve Rogers is now off the hook.

Steve grins. “Well first, I’m going to take you back to New York. Then I’m going to tell you to get off the plane. After that? I’m never going to see you again. And boy, it’ll be a good day after that.”

**…**

Steve is alone in the cockpit on the ride back to New York. They were almost to North Korea, so it’s a long ride back. Franco goes and joins Bucky and Rogen in the cabin. They break into Tony’s liquor cabinet; Steve guesses that the fact that the super soldier serum makes one impervious to alcohol never got into the Captain America porno because Rogen challenges Bucky to a drinking contest and, well, it ends up with two very trashed actors and one very amused super soldier. When things get quiet, Steve enters the cabin, hanging back by the entrance to the cockpit, in case something happens. Both Franco and Rogen are asleep, Franco’s head on Rogan’s shoulder.

“These bozos asleep?” Steve asks.

“Finally,” Bucky says with a laugh. He stands up, and walks over to Steve. He’s got his 1940s cocky swagger back, but infused in it now is a sense of grace, the fluidity of a cat. He stands next to Steve, bumps his shoulder into his. “I was afraid that the little one was gonna die before he passed out. He’s been on enough benders that he doesn’t know when to quit. Didn’t want me to beat him, but it’s sort of impossible.”

“How’d we end up with these knuckleheads?” Steve asks quietly.

Bucky shrugs. “You always did have a knack for attractin’ cock-eyed ninnies.”

“You included?”

Bucky grins, runs a hand through his hair to smooth it back. “’Til the end of the line,” he says, casually taking Steve’s breath away.

**…**

Bucky follows Steve to the cockpit, where he sits quietly and watches the clouds. It’s getting dark out and, after a while, Bucky falls asleep. Back in the day, Bucky snored something fierce, and it always terrifies Steve, the way that he’s silent now. But at least he looks peaceful, with the dull light of the plane’s control panel reflecting off his skin. Steve reaches out, pushes a loose hair from his face. Bucky doesn’t stir, but sighs softly. Looking at Bucky here, Steve’s chest feels warm and tight, and he knows that, as much as he hates to admit it, James Franco was right. Steve is definitely, totally in love with Bucky Barnes and he doesn’t know what to do.

**…**

Bucky’s still sleeping when they land. Steve decides not to wake him—it seems like he sleeps so little now; Steve’s always waking up to find Bucky in the living room, looking out the window at the New York City skyline—and goes to usher James Franco and Seth Rogen off of the plane.

“Thanks man,” Rogen says. “This was cool, even if we didn’t get to go kill Kim Jong-un.”

“That was never on the agenda,” Steve says, but nods. “It was nice to meet you.”

“If you’re ever in LA call me,” Franco says. “I think I could find you some shit that’ll fuck you up right, even with your…” He gestures up and down Steve’s body in a way that makes Steve feel a little uncomfortable. “I got connections.”

“Thank you son, but I think that you should… take a look at the choices you make.” He clears his throat. “Well, the door’s over there—“ he gestures to the door. “I have to go get Bucky.”

Franco raises an eyebrow and if Steve doesn’t meet his eye, well, that’s Steve’s prerogative. “You go get him,” Franco says, then grabs Rogen’s arm and leads him away. “Later!”

“Later,” Steve echoes. The two chuckle as they walk away.

Rolling his eyes, Steve climbs back onboard the plane and heads back into the cockpit. Bucky is awake, poking at some buttons on the control panel. “Know what you’re doing, Sergeant?”

Bucky looks up with a smile. “Better than you do. I hear that the last time you piloted a plane it went nose-down into the ice caps. And I have years of Soviet flight training.”

Steve sits down in the Captain’s chair. “But your side didn’t win the space race.” Bucky rolls his eyes while Steve grins. “Fine, sputnik, tell me how it’s done.”

Bucky turns to Steve, smiles, and for some reason it feels more real than any of the other looks he’s given Steve lately. “Where d’you wanna go?” Bucky asks.

“Huh?”

Bucky shrugs, turns back to the control board. “We could go somewhere, if you wanna. Take a vacation. We got the plane; you were supposed to take the next few days in North Korea. Who’d care if you took ‘em off?”

There’s a thousand reasons Steve should say know. The inevitability of some sort of catastrophe occurring, like that time Steve tried to take a day off to go to the Met and New Orleans became overrun by sea monsters. And there’s the thought of using one of the few planes Steve and his allies—not S.H.I.E.L.D., because even under new management, Steve’s not touching that organization with a ten foot pole—still have to go for a vacation, when someone could really need it.

But Bucky’s looking up at him through his long eyelashes, his face the only bright thing in the darkness of the garage. Steve swallows.

“You always wanted to see the Grand Canyon,” he finds himself saying. Bucky’s eyes light-up. “I haven’t seen it, either.”

“You remembered,” Bucky says, not a question but breathy. Steve nods slowly.

James Franco voice echoes in Steve’s head. _But, like, you’re totally in love with that guy. So even if you don’t wanna just bone him, you should tell him. Because if you don’t, someone else will and man, you’re gonna be pissed._ It’s distracting, because the last thing Steve even remotely wants is to think of James Franco’s floating head in his mind, which is why it takes Steve by surprise when Bucky’s reaching over to Steve, hand cupping his cheek, thumb resting on his cheekbone. “Buck—“

“I had a talk,” Bucky says. He looks down. “With Seth Rogen. He… He told me a lot about this weird future that we both live in. And things have been hard, been strange and I… There’re things that I can do now, be now. And admit now. And Stevie, you know don’t ya? You gotta know that I…”

He can’t say it. But his eyes are blue and sparkling and…

Steve leans down, kisses him. Bucky makes a small noise, surprised and happy. “Grand Canyon,” Steve says when he pulls away. “Sounds right, romantic. A good place to take a boyfriend.”

Bucky laughs. “You old sap.”

“Well, James Franco told me to scoop you up before someone else does. Gotta woo you the right way, y’know? I think Seth Rogen was checking you out a bit too much for comfort…”

Bucky laughs, relaxes into his seat and shuts his eyes. “You liked them, didn’t you.”

“I would never,” Steve says affronted, starting up the plane.

Bucky snorts. “They’re gonna invite us to the premiere. You gonna be my date?”

“They really gonna have a premiere after all this nonsense?”

“Hope so. Wanna put you in a tux so I can rip you out of it.”

And, well, if James Franco brought him this, then maybe the whole thing was worth it.

**Author's Note:**

> Catch you on the flipside. Or alternatively, on my Tumblr: whtaft.tumblr.com. It is a usually James Franco-free zone.


End file.
